I am almost there. Twelve days and I will be the BIG 4-0. I am not sure what is so big about it but apparently it is a big milestone. My Mom always told me how quick the time would go and as usual she was right! There are several things I intended to do by forty but life got in the way. I decided to make a list of 40 things I intended to do by the time I was forty but haven’t quite gotten around too….YET
1. Write a book (two in the works) It takes lots of time to sift through the swamp of shit in your head to find the scraps of pure gold!
2. Be a C.I.A. Agent. This is one of my most elaborate fantasies. I wanted to be a spy like Jennifer Garner in Alias. It is possible I may actually be a spy because sometimes I think I am dreaming about being a spy and I wake exhausted with unexplained bruises. I hope I am working for the good guys!
3. Take my mom to Graceland (sorry Mom) There was this show when I was young, I think it was called Dreams Come True. I wrote a letter hoping that they would send my parents to Graceland…No Dice!
4. Marry Jon Bon Jovi, admittedly this one was a longshot!
5. Be rich. I am not rich in the way I had planned in actual dollars but I am extremely wealthy in other ways!
6. Went on a Wine Country Tour unless you include the extensive wine section at Liquor Depot.
7. Visited Greece.
8. Visited Ireland.
9. Swam with Dolphins
10. Had a tequila party that I remembered!
11. Rang the mission bell at Hotel California
12. Had beers with Sean Connery
13. Learned to like shrimp eww
14. Drank Crystal from the bottle (or at all)
15. Had an Alien encounter.
16. Completed a thousand pc puzzle without swearing and throwing it in the garbage!
17. Watched E.T. This is just shameless and I really need to do this!
18. Made lemonade out of the lemons life sometimes gives me!
19. Gone to the pizza store to order delivery and get a free ride back to my house!
20. Bought a chocolate fountain.
21. Go out Walkin After Midnight singing Patsy Cline at the top of my lungs!
22. Door to door Christmas Carolling (except my own house)
23. Rock and Roll all night and Party Every day. (THIS IS A BOLD FACED LIE)
24. Prove my Royal Ancestry
25. Befriend the annoying Philly Cream Cheese lady who floats on clouds.
26. Give my bologna a last name.
27. Get myself a mascot called Babs the monkey
28. Played ring around the rosie while I had a pocket full of posies.
29. Given myself a really cool nickname.
30. Gave my arm and leg for something I really wanted.
31. Poked a needle in my eye for lying.
32. Made a mountain out of a mole hill.
33. Learned to fly…cause I ain’t got wings.
34. Dancing on the ceiling!
35. Made my own wine (could be dangerous).
36. Gotten myself caught between the moon and New York City…I know it’s crazy but it’s true!
37. Order and wear a cape that says
38. Skipped the light fantastic.
39. Wang Chung. (Tonight or any other night)
40. Used the algebra that was so important for me to learn in my daily life.
Ok I started out strong but forty is a lot of things and along the way I started to struggle. Not because there are not a million things I planned to do before 40 but as I was thinking about it they all seemed unimportant compared to what I have done. Being a mom, a wife, reuniting with my son just seems to Trump every “What if”
I can still learn the Argentine Tango in Argentina, I can still pack up my family and move to a simpler life and live off the land, I can still contemplate life along the Cliffs of Moher.
The important thing is that I am happy and I don’t feel that I missed out on anything. I know the best is yet to come! I don’t think of forty as ancient, as the end of the road. I prefer to think of it as a beginning, a right of passage.
I will still see new things with the grace of a child but will embrace hardships with the maturity of a woman.
The end of one journey signifies the beginning of another. “Goodbye Dirty Thirties. We were great friends but I am going to go my own way now. Naughty at forty? Sounds to me that forties is a time to do what makes you happy. No apologies, no regrets”
Come along for the ride!
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